CALLING IN THE CAVALRY?
*(Yes, this is an image from a video posted by the FOTS. But given the Newlins’ recent troubles, I figured they wouldn’t mind if I borrowed it for usage on my sinful, non-wholesome pro-vampire site.)
Now, on to the main event. Quick update on the mass hypnosis turning local breathers into maddened children:
Nothing’s changed.
In fact, things may even be getting worse. From all accounts the police station is in shambles, the streets are littered with trash, and someone pilfered the top choices from the local butcher. One, ahem, under-clad couple romping outside my home happily informed me the “God who Comes” is coming. Not sure what that means, but I’m caught between hoping this alleged deity shows up to put an end to the whole mess and fearing the arrival may worsen matters.
Really, I’d love to ignore it altogether. This seems to be a human mess, by and large. But frankly, it’s annoying. I much prefer Bon Temps as it was before and would gladly see it return to form. Fortunately, there may be help on the way.
I’ve heard whisperings that the Queen herself is expecting a visitor from the area. Though it could be about another matter altogether, I’d at least like to think it’s related to our little homespun human problem.
Given that this blog is read by mixed company, I’m not at liberty to provide details about the Queen or the larger vampire hierarchy. But let me put it this way: if every vampire in the region were part of one big company, the Queen would be the big boss. Just getting an audience with her is no small honor. She’s wise, powerful, and from what I’ve heard, excellent at party games. If anyone will know how to end the cranial occupation, it’ll be her.
Let’s just hope she’s in a sharing mood.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I can’t bear the noise outside my home any longer. There must be somewhere I can find peace and quiet in this town. I think I’ll try Merlotte’s.
August 31st, 2009 at 1:51 pm
Perhaps its time for a vacation? Get away take a trip to LA or Baghdad surely its calmer there.
August 31st, 2009 at 4:44 pm
If your property has a hose, it might work. Or not.
August 31st, 2009 at 5:51 pm
I concur with Diana, a hose should be most effective in ridding yourself of the problem, but might I suggest snare traps, they can be even more effective when applied properly and can provide hours of fun watching your prey struggle, or possibly even crewing off one of their own limbs. Now I don’t encourage their use with animals, that’s terribly cruel. But breathers now, you can release them when you get bored.
Good luck to you brother.
August 31st, 2009 at 6:03 pm
Merlottes? Really?!
Why not go to Fangtasia?
Hell, go further than that and check out Shrevport.
August 31st, 2009 at 7:49 pm
I’m just glad that the bug-eyes haven’t decided to jump on the internet to spread their madness. The internet’s crazy enough with any gods who come.
August 31st, 2009 at 9:16 pm
My cousin lives just south of Bon Temps and she’s been telling about some of the crazy-ass stuff going on. I hope the Queen can fix this. Stay safe.
September 1st, 2009 at 12:09 pm
Where is the crusaders? They could sweep the place clean of demons in less then three days if they amassed all the troops. And given the attitude Merick expresses, it would probably be of good if they chopped down some graveborne too.
September 1st, 2009 at 12:48 pm
if the queen is involved, it must be big.
I am human, but my female friend is a vamp and she has told me stories about the Queen.
she is not someone you mess with.
September 1st, 2009 at 2:17 pm
Andrew. Try the Bon Temps Cemetery to get awy from it all.
September 1st, 2009 at 4:36 pm
This hardly seems to be in all good fun anymore. At least these humans’ kind of fun. People spewing nonsense and taking weapons to their own flesh. It reminds me of something I saw once. In India, perhaps? Ah, well, it’ll come to me.
I’ve always been a big proponent of blood letting rituals. They’re so invigorating. Too bad this doesn’t seem like one I should go and participate in. Although, I’d sure like to have a look at who or what is causing it. I bet it would be impressive, to say the least.
Well, unless it’s some Cthulhu-like creature. I’ve been hearing odd things about eyes. Either way, I’m very amused thinking about the ones who’ve cut off parts of themselves snapping out of their little frenzy.
September 2nd, 2009 at 2:23 am
Andrew, if anything I’ve heard is true you won’t find peace anywhere in that town. Your queen is aware of the situation. That’s all I can say for now. You’ll just have to ride it out. Important: if there are any humans in Bon Temps that are of value to you, you need get them the hell out of there now and restrain them before they devalue themselves. You should probably gag them as well. The things they say might tempt you to ‘devalue’ them yourself. Good luck.
September 2nd, 2009 at 8:51 am
Ah Richard, you don’t care for my attitude? How sad. Humans have been playing with each other for centuries, why can’t I get in on the fun? I assure you, no Maenad or demon crusader will ever have the best of me. One value, amongst the many of old blood, is the measure of protection its strength gives. Perhaps I shall have to go and see for myself, an impatial observer as it were, do keep us posted. I will enter Bon Temps in my GPS, I have so been longing to get the Z3 on the road again.
September 2nd, 2009 at 12:42 pm
again.. when is everyone gonna learn. vampire, human, rally…. whats the difference besides big teeth and and a longer life…….. sigh your both capable of doin the same things and making the same mistakes. noone is beter or lesser than the other cause as the saying always went, what one lacks the other makes up for……. andrew, i want you to email me if you can
i wanna talk to you
September 3rd, 2009 at 6:45 am
For a movement that seems to want to espouse full integration and rights into the human world, Vampires sure seem to be a snobby bunch.
September 4th, 2009 at 11:46 am
Re: using of the hose to evict under clad imbeciles
I adore the idea of the hose. However, if you have some extra funds I would suggest instead of using traps. Which, let’s face it, will attract some unwelcome attention. I recommend the usage of sprinklers with motion detectors, or remotes. Perhaps it might cool their “ambition” and if all else fails, an electric fence could add to the fun.
September 4th, 2009 at 3:30 pm
Christian and vampire alike profane the old gods and shall be drowned by his love! Bromiusdendriteseleutheriosenorches! The old one comes and the raving sister is his herald! Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Dionysus Houma wgah’nagl fhtagn! They do not live, they do not die, they are outside the cycle! Those of the new Acadiana shall become as the raving god; free and wild and beyond good and evil, with laws and morals thrown aside and all men shouting and killing and revelling in joy. Then the raving sisters shall teach us new ways to shout and kill and revel and enjoy ourselves, and all the earth would flame with a holocaust of ecstasy and freedom! Rejoice all the new Acadiana comes!
December 10th, 2009 at 7:52 am
The cavalry ain’t coming - the cavalry’s only gone and gotten hooked on http://www.dubli.com. I guess it beats emulating the charge of the Light Brigade in the Crimea.
What will happen with the vampires?!
January 6th, 2010 at 9:09 pm
Why wont just one of you louisiana vampires or any vampire thats goodlooking anyway(male please) come make me a believer. Not talking about silly humans who think that they are vampire just because they are lost from this world so they cut on their friends, im talking to REAL vampires here.I have been here in louisiana all of my life and never even once came across an inkling of a feeling that anyone even in new orleans was a real undead vampire. So if you are real undead vampire, able to glamor me then what are you waiting for, where are you and why would you hide from one who is willing to work with you, of course if your real? I never said i want to be a vampire so dont mistake me, i said make me a believer.. I am just here in louisiana, lafayette louisiana that is, well near enough to lafayette, where are you, do you ever hang out on jefferson street on fridays or saturdays, if not , why? Thats where you might find me. But of course i doubt any of you REAL vampires will ever find me. Because you say you dont hang out with humans, whatever. That is nonsence. Be brave, i mean i know this site is just based on a series for HBO . but it got the attention of REAL vampires so, go along with it vampires, work toward getting your rights. Be brave and come hang out on jefferson st downtown lafayette la. Clubs all the way down jefferson. I will make you a deal, if you can deal? My deal is this, if you can find me, then if your glamor works on me, i’ll be ok with you biting me, if your glamor does not work then you have to buy my drinks for the rest of that night. Any serious takers, come you know you just cant resist a challenge, especially when blood is involved. Come on down all vamps welcome, invited what else can i say to get you so hot and interested that you WILL come here and deal with me. Just want proof for my own mind that you are indeed what you claim to be. We will have a great time come on over…
January 6th, 2010 at 9:10 pm
Why wont just one of you louisiana vampires or any vampire thats goodlooking anyway(male please) come make me a believer. Not talking about silly humans who think that they are vampire just because they are lost from this world so they cut on their friends, im talking to REAL vampires here.I have been here in louisiana all of my life and never even once came across an inkling of a feeling that anyone even in new orleans was a real undead vampire. So if you are real undead vampire, able to glamor me then what are you waiting for, where are you and why would you hide from one who is willing to work with you, of course if your real? I never said i want to be a vampire so dont mistake me, i said make me a believer.. I am just here in louisiana, lafayette louisiana that is, well near enough to lafayette, where are you, do you ever hang out on jefferson street on fridays or saturdays, if not , why? Thats where you might find me. But of course i doubt any of you REAL vampires will ever find me. Because you say you dont hang out with humans, whatever. That is nonsence. Be brave, i mean i know this site is just based on a series for HBO . but it got the attention of REAL vampires so, go along with it vampires, work toward getting your rights. Be brave and come hang out on jefferson st downtown lafayette la. Clubs all the way down jefferson. I will make you a deal, if you can deal? My deal is this, if you can find me, then if your glamor works on me, i’ll be ok with you biting me, if your glamor does not work then you have to buy my drinks for the rest of that night. Any serious takers, come you know you just cant resist a challenge, especially when blood is involved. Come on down all vamps welcome, invited what else can i say to get you so hot and interested that you WILL come here and deal with me. Just want proof for my own mind that you are indeed what you claim to be. We will have a great time come on over,,,,,…